Panicking? Who's panicking!
It’s so not even close to that, that I literally can’t talk about it!
Or, can I?
This is all about doing #NaNoWriMo my way after all. I really ought to talk about what it feels like to be not where I’m supposed to be in my word count (even though I’m not supposed to be stressing about that because I knew I had too much to try and fit in this month and so, for me, it was going to be about doing it my way instead.).
I guess though, there’s knowing that and KNOWING that, right?
Because the truth of not being up there with everyone else that's smashing the daily word count, loving their characters’ journey, and coming up with genius ideas for another four books in the series? Well, it kind of utterly stinks.
Because obviously I am secretly under the impression that I’m Superwoman.
Which is mortifying!
Obviously I would much rather secretly want to be under the impression that I’m very grounded, realistic about my limits, and non-competitive (with others, at least).
Because I’m a perfectionist.
This is where being a perfectionist sucks. Instead of sitting down and popping a few words on the page it has you sitting down, putting your hands on the keyboard and…nothing.
And then stressing about the ‘nothing’ for the exact amount of time you had available to write.
And then stressing about the fact that you didn’t write during whatever you are doing next.
And then stressing about the fact that you’re not giving whatever you are doing your full attention.
And so on and so on…
This is also where being a perfectionist eventually doesn’t suck!
Because obviously if you’re perfect, you wouldn’t stress.
And so you stop, take a breath, give yourself a slap, possibly imbibe chocolate or alcohol…possibly both and possibly at the same time, before taking another breath and finally figuring out a way to be okay with not hitting the ideal word count, yet still, crucially, progressing your WIP.
Because that’s what doing it my #NanoWriMo way is supposed to be about.
Actually, that is what writing is about every day.
It’s about getting out of your own way so that you can tell someone's story.
I'm currently at 11,414 of telling someone's story...here are:
Some of the things I've said to get to this point:
“257 words? Really? That’s all you can churn out? Ooh, if you get up at 6am tomorrow you could fit in the remaining 1410 words and then if you don't watch any TV tonight you could write the next 1667.”
“What am I trying to say in this scene? WHAT AM I TRYING TO SAY????”
“I’ve lost my ‘funny’. This scene is totally unfunny. How can I make it more funny? WHERE’S MY FUNNY???”
“Okay, just write the basics and go back in later and add in the funny. And the sexy. And the PLOT. Ugh. What am I trying to say, again????”
“FFS, the time you’ve spent moaning, over-complicating, and panicking, you could have written 5k stream of consciousness. Get. It. Together.”
'Helpful' things my husband has said during week two:
Hunter-Gatherer: “Have you killed off anyone yet?"
Me: “This one’s a romcom not a suspense.”
Hunter-Gatherer: “Oh. Is there actually a rule though that you can’t kill anyone in a romcom?”
Me: “How would that be romantic? Or comedic?”
Hunter-Gatherer: “Right. Well, have they had sex yet?”
Hunter-Gatherer: “There you go then. You’re welcome.”
Next week find out if that was the scene that kick-started the writing again. And research: the #NaNoWriMo way.
How’s your week two been? Drop me a comment and let me know if you're smashing it or panicking it!